Order and Chaos
by Handful of Silence
Summary: Pre-slash. Sulu watches as his best friend nearly dies, and the only thing in his head is that he never had a chance to tell the young russian how he felt.


_I wrote this a while ago when I was first beginning to experiment with this pairing. I'm not to sure about it, but a friend of mine convinced me to put it up. If anyone has any comments about this, don't hesitate to say, please!_

**Order and Chaos**

Sulu doesn't notice that Chekov has been hurt. Not at first. The two men pick themselves up off the dusty ground, Sulu holding his hand out to pull Chekov back onto his feet, grinning like a maniac who has just narrowly escaped death. Which of course, he just had.

"You just saved my life," the helmsman smiles, looking incredulously over at the alien who just ten seconds earlier had tried to kill him.

Sulu and Chekov had gone down to the planet surface to help oversee a diplomatic meeting between the two occupants of the planet, the _Yidl_ and the _Urck_, who had been fighting over land for several centuries. The man who had tried to kill Sulu had been a rogue _Yidl_ intent on disrupting the meeting and when Sulu had found him out, he'd pulled a poison-tipped dagger from his pocket, aiming it at the helmsman. Chekov had pushed him out of the way before the knife had hit him, and the man was now being led into the appropriate custody on this planet, his dagger lying discarded on the floor.

Chekov grins at Sulu's statement, his blue eyes lighting up

"I am your hero, Hikaru," he jokes, before the toothy smile on his face drops suddenly, and he collapses, like a puppet with its' strings cut, his eyes rolling up into his head. It's only now that Sulu notices the blood on the tip of the knife, and the red stain that's beginning to spread across Chekovs shirt like an advancing army, the golden yellow staining deep red.

"Oh god, Chekov" Sulu whispers, dropping to his knees, pulling his communicator out with shaking hands "Sulu to Enterprise. Come in Scotty, please"

"Aye, Sulu. I'm here"

"Scotty, you need to beam me and Chekov back to the Enterprise, right now"

"I can't at the moment, lad. I'm rebootin' the transporter after that power surge knocked them out. I'm gonna need some time to get them fully operational, so you can come back on board"

"I don't have time, Scotty!" Sulu snaps at the engineer, knowing he's being unfair but also knowing that he needs to get Chekov back to the Enterprise "Chekov's hurt and he needs urgent medical attention"

"I'll do the best I can, Sulu," He hears Scotty reply honestly, the worry in Scotty's voice as clear as the panic in his own and Sulu knows that all he can do is wait and hope that the best will be enough

Sulu looks down at Chekov, the Russian grasping the helmsman's hand hard as the poison infiltrates his body further. In two minutes, Chekov's organs will go into shock and Sulu knows that if he doesn't get medical attention by five, all the anti-toxins in the world wont save him. Assuming he doesn't bleed to death first

Sulu tries to smile for Chekovs sake, fixing the Russian with a fond look when the ensign catches his eye and squeezes his hand as though to say 'it's alright'. He doesn't know who he's trying to kid.

"It had to be you, didn't it?" he mock admonishes, attempting to stop the bleeding, and Chekov smiles, with what looks like all his effort, although he looks like he's trying so hard not to cry from the pain as Sulu pushes down hard, putting pressure on his wound.

"I know. I am nuisance" Chekov bites down on his lip, but doesn't cry out "Cannot go anywhere without getting into trouble, da?" He hisses, as a fresh wave of pain washes over him, and he can't stop a small gasp escaping from his mouth

"You silly idiot" Sulu whispers stroking Chekov's hair back from his forehead "Why did you have to push me out of the way?"

"I don't know" Chekov breathes, grinning his usual toothy smile "Beginning to regret it now. Maybe I'll stab you with the knife, make you feel better about zis" Chekov's eyes widen and he gasps with the pain coursing through every bone in his body " vhen ve get out of zis" he pants through his teeth, trying not to scream "You owe me, Hikaru. Big time"

Sulu laughs but it sounds incredibly hollow. He needs to keep Chekov awake, needs to keep him talking, long enough for Scotty to get them out of here. If he ever does. " Yeh, I'll buy you a vodka in the rec-room. With proper ice and real lemons, and we'll get some traditional Russian stuff. OK?"

"Russian wodka is best. Is only wodka vorth buying" Chekov breathes out, his sentences becoming slightly disjointed as he struggles to remain coherent, although the faint grin never leaves his face " and vhen ve get back, after the wodka, you are not going to mention your bloody plants for veek, you hear? I am better company then Woltroian wine-sweepers"

Sulu attempts a smile, seeing the teasing look in the Russians eyes, before his entire body spasms, his eyes rolling up again so he can see the whites, and a small cry of agony escaping Chekov.

"Stay with me, Pavel" Sulu hears himself beg, all the while thinking, not now, oh god, please, don't die now, not here. "Hold on, please"

"Beaming up now, Sulu" he hears Scotty's voice over the communicator, and the only thing he can look at as the world dissolves around him is Pavels' bloody form, pale and shaking and the thought that if Chekov dies, he'll never be able to forgive himself.

*

"It's bloody lucky we got to him in time" Bones complains to a worried looking Sulu "couple more minutes and he wouldn't be here"

Sulu only nods, his mind trying not to think about what could have happened, if Scotty hadn't been able to beam them up. It's bad enough that it nearly did.

Bones casts a critical eye over a sleeping Chekov. All traces of the poison have been neutralised and the Russians eyes are closed, his bandaged chest rising and falling softly as he breathes in and out.

"Kid's ok now, stable, but I'll keep an eye on his condition for a couple of days, just to be on the safe side. For now, he's off duty 'till I say" Bones looks at his watch, taking in the time. It's old-fashioned to have a watch nowadays, but it's an old family heirloom that he's clung onto over the years. " I know he wont be happy to hear that, so you can tell him when he wakes up" Bones looks over at Sulu, who has been so silent since they brought Chekov back onto the Enterprise, bloody and half-dead, and even now his eyes are only focused on the Russian on the bed next to him, like he's the only thing in the world that matters. Bones doesn't know whether that's just deep friendship or something more, but he decides the latter as he catches Sulus eye. Not that it's his business anyway.

"I'll leave you with him. Make sure you get some sleep, mind, my work-load's big enough already without you adding to it"

Sulu smiles at the doctor's words, dragging his gaze away from Chekov's form for a moment "I will. Thank you, Doctor"

"Night, Sulu" Bones says, turning to leave.

"Night," Sulu's eyes flick back to Chekov as he hears the Doctor leave, and he thinks about that terrible moment on the planets surface when Chekov was dieing and he couldn't do a damn thing about it. There was only one thought that came into his head as he watched McCoy wheel Chekov into the medical bay on a bio-bed, a thought so strong and clear it blocked out everything else, if only for a second. _I never told him I loved him._

Sulu had dismissed the thought as worry for his friend. He didn't _love _Chekov, although they were close. They always found something to talk about during their long bridge shifts, and on most days went to the rec room after shift for a drink. Chekov would often take Sulu back to his quarters to show him a new equation or thrash him at a game of 3D chess, or Sulu would end up taking Chekov back to his to show him a new plant or attempt to teach the Russian to fence.

They did everything together, but it's only now as Sulu stands at Chekov's bedside, watching the young man sleep that he realises how close they actually are and how deep his feelings for Chekov go.

It all makes sense suddenly, and he knows without a doubt that he, Hikaru Sato Sulu is completely and utterly in love with Pavel Andreievich Chekov. He loves how Chekov pronounces his name, how he flushes with embarrassment when he becomes overexcited, how Chekov can listen to every word he says, no matter how disinterested he is. He loves everything about the Russian, loves the way his hair sticks up at peculiar angles after he's ran his hand through it, loves the way his eyes are always so bright and honest, and his only regret as he watched Chekov being taken away from him was that he never told him.

But it's different now, Sulu thinks because he knows that this is real. It isn't just a schoolboy crush, isn't something that is just going to go away. He knows that he loves Chekov and always will and the thought that he should wake the ensign up and tell him right now, at this minute, flashes momentarily across his mind. But he stops himself. No, not yet, he reminds his impatient heart. He has plenty of time to tell Chekov when the Russian has recovered, but for now he just needs to be a friend, to take care of him. The rest of it can wait.

"Goodnight, Chekov" Sulu whispers, softly retreating to the door and dimming the lights, going back to his own room across the hall. The words in his head die down, waiting for the right time to be spoken. "Until tomorrow"


End file.
